The Battle of the Ants

...is not a new movie. It's a battle that's been raging in my home. I live in Florida. I know there are bugs, but these dear, dear little ants -- too many to make friends with -- are just everywhere to be found. I realize they need a place to go, and I realize that I have plants around my house and they like that, but ...

We were losing.
So.
We called in a Professional.

Yes, we bit the bullet and got prices and choose the best price, and the new bug man came to put down some stuff that will take care of our problem.

And is that all that happened?
No. Not quite.

I have mentioned from time to time, shelves -- shelves are very important in a small and tiny home. I love my shelves.

In the closet that has the attic opening, there are shelves on both sides, and across the back. Holding lots and lots of books and other memorabilia.
So.
The new bugman has to go up in the attic to fog the attic. It's to be done one time, and that is supposed to take care of that -- for at least a year, I guess.
So.
On the way down from the ladder (a three step ladder), the bugman tries to 'steady' himself, on the shelves in the closet.
When they came down, it was the loudest noise I've ever heard in a house. And, no, he was not hurt. One strip of the shelving was ripped out of the wall, three shelves come away from the wall.

He quickly told me that the shelves were not installed properly (didn't know that shelves in a closet were required to meet a code that held 200 + pound human beans), that they should not have been 'held up by just a nail' (good grief, like that was even a little bit true!), and, oh yeah, he said he was 'sorry about that."

(I have to admit, I stood there shocked at his reaction. The expression on my face was, expressionless. I have no expression for such an extreme lack of intelligence and common sense. After all, he did just cause a huge margin of damage in my house...I mean, somewhere, termites are laughing.)

Lots of books on my futon right now.

Looks like, the ants are (still) winning.

So.
I'm leaving this note on my door --

Dear Ants,

Please accept our sincerest and most heartfelt apologies. We regret calling in the likes of Human Beans to act as a mediator betwixt us and thee. Can you forgive us?

We wish only to live in peace. Perhaps we could make a peace offering to you. Perhaps we could deposit bread crumbs and/or dried cakes on the boundaries of our property for you to feast on. We could leave raisins, also. Rumor has it that ants love raisins, yes?

Please let us know if you accept our terms before the humans of the world do more damage to our home than you ever could.

And, just so you know, we are firing the humans. (They are rude and careless things that we sometimes find so annoying...)

Respectfully yours,

Your humble neighbors of the planet.